Colony Metalsmith Large Rural Mailbox (Hammered) - MB12HPL (pullware)

Posted by Admin on February 8th, 2010

Colony Metalsmith Large Rural Mailbox (Hammered) - MB12HPL

Colony Metalsmith Large Rural Mailbox (Hammered) - MB12HPL

(By:-ColonyMetalsmith) Our large rural mailbox holds lots of mail and catches everyones attention 11 3/4 in x 10 1/2 in x 22 1/2 in large rural hammered surface

Retail: $ 0.00    Your Price: $215.08   Buy/More Info

Christmas Shopping and Men Don’t Mix

I’ll be blunt. Most men detest shopping. Unless they are searching for some sort of power tool for themselves.

Only this morning, my other half breezed enthusiastically into our home office brandishing his latest gadget-like purchase. At the time, I was sitting gazing at a blank PC screen searching for inspiration, which arrived instantly in the form of a Bosch Router.

“Look at this!” he enthused, as he waved this heavy metal object menacingly above my head. “Remember me telling you about how I wanted an edging tool, so that I could get a nice profile on the borders of furniture, like this desk for example?” he said, running his middle finger across the perimeter of his recent creation and then swiftly removing it when the razor-sharp edge sliced through his flesh.

“Well, now that I’ve got this, I can do that”, he gushed, as I ducked to avoid this now identified flying object swooping precariously past my cranium, whilst he gave a charades’ type demonstration of the action that one would employ when using such a contraption.

Mention the words B&Q, Do-It-All, Homebase and, above all, power tools and his face lights up like a Halloween pumpkin. Mention any other type of shopping, for anyone other than himself, and his features contort into an expression on a par with someone who’s just stepped, barefooted, into a pile of dog excrement.

Naturally, from a man’s point of view, Christmas is the worst time of year to engage in the tedious pastime of shopping, not just for one person, but for a miscellaneous assortment of friends and relatives, some of whom you only hear from once a year via a brown paper package containing a home knitted garment.

This loosely-woven hand knit is generally a ferret-coloured sweater that would fit a cross between an anorexic chicken and monkey, sent with much love from someone with a name like Auntie Ivy, who always has stale, tea breath, who wears rancid, Eau-de-Skunk perfume and whose Orang-utan lipstick overflows the outline of her lips and invades the rest of her face in a haphazard pattern. Oh, and she always seems to forget that you’ve matured somewhat, mentally and physically, since you were a mere six years old.

As far as men are concerned, Christmas shopping is best left until an hour before closing time on Christmas Eve. This is the “panic and buy anything for the sake of having to” hour and trying to secure the best of what is remaining on the spartan shelves.

The tacky choice generally includes a cellophane wrapped set of Lavender fragranced talc and bath cubes, a pair of musical Santa socks, a reduced price window candle arch, with two faulty bulbs and a Popular Christmas Songs album, by some obscure artist sporting a coat hanger grin, Grecian 2000 hair and a diamond-patterned pullover.

The only time that my partner enjoys the shopping experience as a couple, is when we visit select underwear stores, allowing him to sidle off and rifle lustfully through the transparent lingerie and waggle his fingers through the gap in crotchless panties. When shopping as an attached man, he can conduct himself in this manner without question. Unaccompanied, he would give the impression of either being a pervert or of harbouring a secret fetish for cross-dressing.

Last week, accompanied by our two-year-old daughter, we visited a shopping mall in Bristol to “tentatively” search for some Christmas gifts. Led by my “likes to be in control” partner, we skirted past 101 women’s clothes’ shops before I barely had time to drool longingly through the window at some over-priced, flirtatious little number, as it hung perfectly from some unbelievably stick-like, plastic dummy. And no, I don’t mean Pamela Anderson.

Suddenly, without prior warning, my beloved quickened his pace to the equivalent of having had a large stick of dynamite lodged up his behind, before veering sharply to the right and cutting across the paths of innocent pedestrians. He must have assumed that I was following, since not once did he glance over his shoulder to check that I was trotting dutifully behind.

Darting in and out of a bustling crowd of people, who all seem to be travelling at right angles to you, is not so much of a problem when you are not weighed down by any sort of baggage. However, when you have a mind-of-its-own pushchair and a large, golfing umbrella that has a habit of piercing unsuspecting victims in the nether regions, life becomes a tad more difficult.

After playing skittles with the pushchair and mobile human targets and ruining a nice young man’s reproductive capacity with my umbrella spike, I spotted my eager sidekick disappearing into a store that had “The Gadget Shop” emblazoned across the entrance.

Typical.

He spent more time in this store excitedly twiddling with knobs (imagining they were nipples, no doubt) and pushing various buttons, than we did in total looking around the entire mall. After declaring, “I’ve got to get one of these” at least ten times, he announced, “Well, that’s about it then. Not really much else here is there?”

“So aren’t we actually going to do any Christmas shopping today then?” I enquired.

“No, I think I’ll take a day off work in December”, he said.

“When, exactly?” I asked.

“Oh, probably Christmas Eve”, he replied……..

Jan Andersen is a British Freelance Writer and Humorist and mother of four children. Jan specialises in satirical and inspirational articles, features, columns, sketches and screenplays on diverse issues from relationships and parenting, to social issues and alternative medicine. Jan is in the process of completing a humorous, non-fiction book and is currently writing two comedy screenplays

How To Attain And Retain Peace Of Mind

?Do not disturb.? This sign is often times seen on doorknobs of hotel rooms. Obviously, the person on the other side of the door wants some peace and quiet. This kind of peace is superficial, one that is obvious and literal.

There?s another kind of peace most people aspire for. It?s peace of mind. Some people have peace of mind only when they are asleep. Perhaps this is possible only when they are physically tired or exhausted, and the urge to sleep is stronger than the need to have peace of mind.

However, having a disturbed mind will keep you awake night after night. Your entire well-being will be adversely affected. Your physical health will deteriorate. The longer this persists, the more extensive the damages will become. Don?t wait until the damage becomes irreversible.

Find the cause of your troubled mind. Trouble lies in the mind. Ask yourself what is disturbing you. Part of it is probably made up of fear, self-pity, insecurity, and failures, to name a few. All of these are products of negative thinking that pollutes the mind unnecessarily. Face your troubles with courage by casting out the negative feelings of fear and insecurity. Empty your mind of all these negative habits. Don?t leave your mind empty for long to prevent it from leaning back to the negative side.

Keep on casting out all negative thoughts by emptying them from your mind, and refill with positive and inspiring thoughts. Do this process as often as necessary - every time you think you need to. By repeating this process, you are practicing good habits aimed at keeping your mind free of negative thoughts and full of positive vibrations to achieve peace of mind. Ultimately, this habit will become part of your daily activities until you get used to it. Once you do, you will find everything you do to be positive based in an effortless manner.

You may ask, ?Just how do you unload negative thoughts and load in positive ones?? One of the best ways to do this is by visualization. Picture peaceful scenes in your mind. For instance, you can initially picture in your mind a rainforest being battered by stormy weather. Branches of trees are vigorously swinging in all directions. Everything seems to be chaotic, just like a troubled mind. But storms don?t last. They move on. When they leave, sunshine or good weather comes in.

A troubled mind is like a storm in your mind. Once the problem is gone, you will have peace of mind. Try to build a strong foundation of positive attitudes so that when another storm hits your mind, you?re prepared to face it. This is similar to practicing positive attitudes. Going back to the rainforest on a beautiful weather, doesn?t it look and feel peaceful? This is how your state of mind should be - peaceful so that it can be harnessed to obtain an enjoyable life.

There are many other ways to generate a peaceful mind. Think of words that suggest a calm mind - words like tranquil (a tranquil sea), serene, harmony, and stillness. Read poems, phrases, and excerpts that suggest a peaceful mind. You can also join group talks where the discussion is centered on how to achieve a mind harmonious with peace, love, and happiness. If you prefer to be on your own, moments of silence can make you obtain peace of mind. The library is a suitable place to be in. Pick up a book that suggests peace of mind and you may be able to find other means to obtain your objective.

About the Author:

Do you believe that you can attain anything your heart desires? I’m telling you, you can! Rene Graeber uses and teaches will power and mind control for more than 10 years. Visit his website and learn how to unleash your full potential of your mind - just visit http://www.will-power-mind-control.com